The Aftermath of a Tragedy

A portrait of Cesar Tellez and Guadalupe Ramos-Tellez adorns the

altar during a memorial Mass on Monday at St. John the Evangelist Church in White Plains. They died in a fire Thursday in North White Plains. Cesar Tellez made it out of the burning house but went back for his wife. (Angela Gaul/The Journal News)

Update: I just found out that the fire was caused by faulty dishwasher wiring!!! This puts a whole new slant on this tragedy.

After my last blog post showing the photos of the fire I realized that pictures do speak louder than words. When I tried to explain the course of this tragic fire I didn't know exactly what had happened. We were driving around during the worst part of it. But the photos showed people the entire scene. The comments on that post showed me how many people are my friends and what friends will offer you in a crisis. I feel like one of the luckiest people in the world because of how my friends rallied around me and gave me strength to face the next days.

Last night I attended the memorial service for my dear neighbor Cesar and his wife Guadalupe. The church was filled to the brim with people in the pews and there were about six or seven rows of people standing in the back. There were two large paintings of the couple on either side of the altar and wreaths of white flowers shaped in a heart with red roses laced through them also stood on either side of the altar. For a Jewish girl so many flowers were strange. Yes, we have flowers along the altar if there is a synagogue service. But usually we send money to charity in the deceased behalf. However, my family wanted to send our respects and so I ordered flowers to be delivered to the church. Seriously, I have no idea if they were there, because you can't go searching for your own flowers during the service. Then when people started taking communion there wasn't a chance either. But I hope they were there.:)

I wanted to see his family, because I wrote a poem a few nights after the tragedy in his and his wife's honor. Unlike the Jewish service, people didn't say a eulogy. So I handed the poem to his younger brother and hugged all of his family. I couldn't stop crying during the service so I looked worn and shell shocked when I got outside. But don't you know when you look the crappiest someone wants to interview you. There was Channel 12 again asking me how I felt. Also the Journal News interviewed me. You can learn more about it in this article rehashing what happened.

How did I feel? Nothing seems real anymore. In a few days my pretty settled life unraveled and nothing is the same anymore. We have been living in a hotel since the fire made us leave and now we found out on Sunday that our apartment is no longer habitable. We are looking for a new place, looking for a way to clean our possessions and looking for a way to make sense of this whole event.

Why should a lively, healthy 28 year old man and his young wife suddenly be gone? His heroic act raised him above the normal man and into a place reserved for superheroes. I had a superhero living next door to me and I didn't know. I wonder if he knew that the few minutes when he was outside with the rest of his family would be his last. Yet his act of bravery is why I can't get him out of my mind. At a time when he had to make a decision he chose to save his wife and perish with her. That sentence itself brings me to tears. This sad act overwhelms everything else that happened because of the fire.

Caesar and Guadelupe are going to be sent back to their native home town for burial in Mexico. Now they will be together and at peace for all eternity. They are loved by their friends and this was obvious last night when the whole community came together for support and love. As I shook the hands of strangers after the ceremony I felt welcomed by these warm and hard working people who tried valiantly to pay attention to the service as their children whimpered.

This tragedy brought home to me what so many mothers and fathers have suffered when they lose a son or daughter due to war. This was a house fire and not war, but in many respects it was the same. The devastation was the same and so was the emotion as a young life was senselessly destroyed.

As I mentioned I wrote a poem. I'm posting it in honor of this young couple and the heroism of my neighbor:

Sleep Well, My Friend – Sueno Bien, Mi Amigo
In Honor of Cesar and Guadalupe
by Barbara Ehrentreu

Sleep well, my friend. Though your journey has been short Your broad heart encompassed all who needed you

Tireless to the end you raced
for your love despite the flames licking at your heels
as you flew up the stairs

Sleep well, my friend
Your work is through
Others will wash and polish your cars
shine them to the gleam we all saw
Others will take over the yoke of the leader
you were.

Sleep well with your love
In one flash you and she were gone,
trapped by the furor of the raging flames’ unfolding petals
buried by the deluge of fire.
You are gone too young,
too soon.

Sleep well, my friend
Crowds of angels wait to lay laurel leaves upon your brow
for the hero you were
Though your beloved red car remains in the driveway
I picture you sailing through the gates of heaven
in the drivers’ seat

Sleep well my friends.

Copyright 2010 by Barbara Ehrentreu