Quotable Thursday and We Have a Winner!

Writers write for the same reason readers read, to find out what's gonna happen.

--Elmore Leonard

Today for Quotable Thursday on Pamposh Dhar's Teratali Reiki and Counseling I came across this from a favorite author, Elmore Leonard. If you haven't read any of his books, try reading at least one of them. Several have been turned into movies.

But the reason I chose this quote is because I understand what he means here. As a writer I never really know what will happen when I put my fingers on the keyboard or if I'm writing long hand what will happen when my pen touches the paper. Usually I start with only a few words or a sentence in my head and when that is written it takes off on its own. It's kind of like I write this blog.:) I have an idea of what I'm going to say, but the actual words come straight from my fingers. This is not always true for other writers. I've heard of writers who write the whole thing in their head and it comes out like a copy machine. But it's fun to know that I have something in common with Elmore Leonard.:)

For anyone who is interested, here is Elmore Leonard's essay, "Elmore Leonard's Ten Rules of Writing". If you're looking for a way to start revising your manuscript you really don't have to look anywhere else for a succinct list of what to do. And this prolific author is still on TV plugging the movie of his book at 83! He wouldn't like my exclamation points at all.:)

I did the drawing for the free book and we have a winner!!!!! Actually, to be fair, I had my daughter do it.:) If you didn't comment remember there's always next time. For the others thank you so much for participating.

The winner is: Out - Numbered!!!!!!!

As soon as Cynthia is contacted she will send you the book. For anyone who doesn't know who this is, Out-Numbered AKA/ Jason Mayo, writes a blog called Out-Numbered. You will see that I have it as one of my favorite blogs. I try not to miss any of his posts, because they are funny and honest. I actually featured his blog here on one of my posts. You can go here to read more about it. Since then he has won a number of awards that are well-deserved and of course, he has now won a free book, Remote Control by Cynthia Polansky. Jason, I hope you enjoy the book!

Today my older daughter found out that she has a double vitamin deficiency. She has a vitamin B12 and a vitamin D deficiency. So she now has to get a B12 shot every day for seven days. Then it will go to once a week and finally to once a month. We're hoping it isn't going to be a serious diagnosis since she also has anemia and already has some symptoms like numbness and tingling in her fingers. To add to this she has arthritis in her neck!! Holy sh-t!!! Who knew? She did complain about this, but she is the one with depression and we all thought that it went along with it. Now it seems that the vitamin B12 deficiency could have caused her depression! Now I'm wondering how long she has had that, because she became depressed at 16 and if it was a vitamin deficiency I'm wondering why a doctor didn't pick this up before now. Think of how much money we could have saved in psychiatrist bills!!!! Also, think of all the pills she's taken through the years. As I said, I'm just hoping that she doesn't have anything serious. Fingers are crossed that they got this in time!!

Here is another little tidbit from Betty Butler, who has most graciously sent me material since I put her on my blog. For anyone who did not read the first material you can find it here... I am going to post both the essay she wrote about the poem and the poem she wrote about the experience. First the poem:

MY JOB IS AN EVERYDAY CHRISTMAS DAY JOB
By Betty Butler ©2000

Finding my mission, path, my life’s work
Was a gift from God, not a whimsical quirk.
A friend and I wrote a song called Healers of the Heart™
This is how our business names got their start.

Playing therapeutic harp has blessed our lives,
Conventions, hospitals, memorials and at bedside.
We’ve both traveled extensively, far and wide
But the why and how of this work is difficult to describe.

While my music will not impress a Broadway critic
I provide more than moody music for the sick.
My training in hospice and grief counseling,
Enlightens my intuition so compassionate service is fulfilling.

Alongside my harp with my poems and my songs
I am invited to journey along.
As a companion and a sacred witness
Of life’s passages of pain, joy, and bliss.

One Christmas a Rabbi came to my Christian congregation
Lecturing on the camps of Auschwitz concentration.
I played a lengthy prelude and then postlude too
Over and over, just the three Jewish songs I knew.

Rabbis said, “This Holocaust pains me, but I can’t forget
My goal is to pass on remembrance permanently set
In the minds of all, past wrongs and honored memories
These words and music will bring everyone to their knees.

The audience rose but did not applaud
Awe struck by the miraculous ways of God.
Tears flowed freely as they embraced
Sadness glistened, streaming down each face.

Many stood, arm-in-arm, swaying
Transfixed by what my harp was saying.
Grief stricken for hero’s stories untold
Grateful for the many sacrifices of long ago.

“His story makes my hurting heart cry inside.
I can’t stop the tears and I really have tried.
Please fix me, Mommy!” My baby girl cried.
My soul prayed the Healing One would comfort & abide.

Three Christian matrons approached: “We’ve toured Israel,
The lyrics of those tunes we know very well.
Christmas songs today would not do. We’re glad you are only playing Jewish songs
Rock of Ages, Amazing Grace would have been all wrong.

Another matriarch said, “Keep playing, don’t stop, keep going.
Your healing heart harp is steadily showing
How distance and difference can be moved aside
One-by-One, note-by-note, heart-by-heart, side-by-side.”

I’ve learned music is our common language
In our tears there is a sacred message
Our hugs are our universal vocabulary
For healing the heart to be an eternal emissary.

So what do I do exactly, you ask?
I’ve really been given a simple task.
I play only a small part
I attempt to touch each heart.

From birth through life’s journey to closure at the end.
I encourage acceptance and celebration of life’s transition...
Home-coming, Home-going, I try to set the mood for life’s reunions.
With sacred songs creating bonding communion.

Whether stateside, Oceanside, out or inside
No cure, but soothing comfort and healing besides
In the doorway, chair, bedside or side-by-side
I hope my Harpside Theraharpy will meet you Heartside.

Healers of the Heart Outreach
Heartside Theraharpy at Harpside
Are trademarks of Healers of the Heart™

More information contact Betty Butler
113 Velarde N.W. Albuquerque, New Mexico 87107

My Job Blessed By a Rabbi

This poem took a long time for me to process, digest, because it was so profound an experience. People talk about when their hearts break open... or "when what you do meets what the universe needs then you have found your destiny". That's what happened.

I got to the church an hour early to be tuned, [cuz] cold weather causes harp strings to break even in the heated car.. etc....

I started playing (the) prelude about twenty minutes before (the) scheduled start as people trickled in.

There were few teens or younger, [cuz[ this was a Holocaust speaker, A Rabbi from a large Synagogue in Albuquerque. I was at a church in a rural northern New Mexico village.

We were not expecting many, but mostly baby boomers. The grey group started to arrive...and were quite familiar that I was not playing any of their favorite hymns.One practically yelled at his spouse,"Doesn't she KNOW anything else?"

I only had three Jewish Hymns in sheet music before me.

The starting hour began, and no Rabbi. This was 1999 so cell phones had not caught on much. Someone ran to a gas station telephone and called his house. Whomever answered was disturbed from her nap and cranky (and said) that he had left an hour before.

I played on...and on....and on. By half past the hour, the chapel was full and they were antsy. They were bored with my music, and I was being very stubborn about not playing anything else.

At a quarter to the hour, he and his driver arrived, having gotten lost, gotten off at the wrong freeway exit and turned around... He was elderly and frail and stressed. He looked around for the source of the music. The guide motioned to me, up on the stand, just behind the podium to his right. He smiled, nodded, put his hand on his heart and said, "Oh, you have found one of mine." As he passed in front of me, he patted the air above my head, above my shoulders and above my harp. I wanted to weep.

My Native American part of me wanted to say, "Thank you, Grandfather."
The Chinese Dragon Lady wanted to bow and say, "SheaShea"
The Kahuna in me wanted to say, "Mahalo, Aloha."
The city mouse wanted to salute and say, "Namaste"

The little country mouse did nothing.
She folded her hands in her lap, and looked at them thru out his speech, letting the tears drop in puddles in my palms.

The guide had to touch me that a closing prayer was going to be given, blessing on the refreshments (Bagels and Cream Cheese how cliche)...and then I was to play until the Chapel emptied and all had a chance to shake his hand in the reception line.

I began to play, I glanced three or four pews down in the center. I could see my two little girls, 9 and 11 were clinging to each other weeping. Everyone else was swaying, crying and not leaving. No one was complainng now about my music. They stood and silently hummed and wept.

Rabbi finally took the guide by the hand and said they would have to leave or no one would move out. It was the most somber reception I've ever attended. That Sunday was one of the most profound, sacred Sabbaths I've attended.

It would be several days for the poety to percolate.
My littlest one would come and lay her head on my shoulder and weep.
A few days passed...One morning as I was going to drive them to school, she came in the foyer for what I thought was a cutsey Eskimo Kiss Goodbye but she leaned forward to touch forehead to forehead. Little crystal saddness drops landed on my chest. She begged to be allowed to stay home.

The REAL MOM would not let her.

Several Days later I got the letter from the program I had been in for almost a year to tell me I was dropped because I was too emotional and teary and "Unsuited for this work."

As I write these memories now, I recall my youngest coming to me in the hallway at her school. I had just gotten home from a week of speeches in Washington, DC on American Airlines. I had been called to school to substitute for the Journalism/FIlm in TV class for the instructor who had been called away to go to NYC/DC to cover the Twin Towers/Pentagon "story." My child dove into me, arm in arms, we were once again forehead to forehead....
heartside to heartside...

"Mommy, my heart hurts."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OMG! Who could say anything after this! Yes, there really are people like Betty in this world and thank goodness for that!!

Until the next time, thank you to all my readers and Congratulations to Out-Numbered, Jason Mayo, who will soon have Remote Control in his hands.

One more thing you should know is that there is a way for you to copyright your blog for free so none of your material can be altered without your permission. Check out the copyright logo at the bottom of the page. You have to scroll all the way to the end.

Quotable Thursday

George Eliot 19th Century Woman Writer
"from a painting by D'Albert-Durade,
made when the novelist was thirty years of age

"Yes! Thank God; human feeling is like the mighty rivers that bless the earth; it does not wait for beauty—it flows with resistless force, and brings beauty with it."
---George Elliot, Adam Bede

This is for all the women writers I know. Pam of Teratali Reiki and Counseling, this is for you too. This is also for the Women's Blogger Directory of which I am a part. We are women hear us roar!!!!

Today I am posting a quote I recently saw that expressed how I feel about expressing feelings. As you can see, it comes from a writer from the nineteenth century. She was a brave forerunner for the women who are now commonplace as authors. Yet at the time she wrote it was highly unusual for women to be well known authors. She lived from 1821-1881 and during that time she constantly challenged the accepted mores for time in which she lived. In this biographical information we can see why she might have written this about feelings.

Unfortunately, George Elliot whose real name was Mary Ann Evans/Marion Evans, was unable to write under her own name. In fact there was a controversy over her first novel, Adam Bede. Impostors tried to take credit for it. When it was revealed that she had written the book all was solved.

There is more about this fascinating author, but I have to get to my guest author. So that is all for this post. Please see the following post to learn about Cynthia Polansky and her writing.

In the meantime, I'm so glad that people like George Elliot came before us and women no longer have to disguise their own identities to publish major works. I don't think she has been paid enough attention by modern writers. I do remember reading Silas Marner in high school and not really appreciating it. If I had known that George Elliot was really a woman I wonder how much more interest I would have had in it.:) Come to think of it my teacher never told us it was written by a woman or else it just didn't sink in, which is probably because I was so bored and didn't pay attention.:)

Quotable Thursday and Apologies for no Guest Author

Salmon Rushdie

I thought we would have a guest author today, but that has not happened yet. So since this is Quotable Thursday I will leave a quote for Pam from Teratali Reiki and Counseling here. My quote for the day is from Salmon Rushdie:

"A poet's work is to name the unnamable, to point at frauds, to take sides, start arguments, shape the world, and stop it going to sleep."

- Salmon Rushdie

I am sorry that we don't have the guest author as planned. It is a matter of internet kris-cross. I sent her the questions, but unfortunately though she returned the answers, they got lost somewhere in the outer reaches of the internet where email goes to die.:) I have no idea where it went, but we are planning for next Thursday. So please come back for the interview. In the meantime I will be giving you more information about Cynthia Polansky and her writings.

In the meantime I am a member of a group called acewriters and today I was sent an email from one of the group, Betty Butler, who is an extraordinarily good poet and has actually been doing an angel's work for awhile. She has allowed me to post her poem and the story that goes with it. She had me in tears by the end of the story. Here it is:

A TheraHarpist's Prayer
by Betty Butler

As I dedicate my life this day


To the service of all those who come my way


Let my music, my words, my voice be a start


To touch each one with healing of their heart.


When at last the day is done,


If I've helped someone, just one,


Let wisdom, joy and peace fill me,


And rejoice that it was done as if to thee.

(c)2000 Betty Butler
Healers Of the Heart Theraharpist (TM)

Now here's the story. Warning: Read it with tissues close to you. You will need them.

Betty Butler on Inkwell, Inc.


A Fragile Life

My regular station is Friday afternoons from Noon to 3 at the Hospice here. I had just finished my "shift" and was just finishing my last song when the Firemen noisely brought in a comotose patient on a stretcher and her social worker followed close behind. The social worker ordered me to follow them to the patients' room to "help the transition go better." I complied. I played several songs while they transferred her to the bed and they left the room. The social worker motioned for me to follow her into the hall.

The social worker said she was going out of town for the weekend and that I was now "it." I told her I was a grief counselor, not the case worker, and that I left at 3. She said, "well you can't now, you have to stay and be with her until the end. It will only be an hour or so."

I explained I had a school age child getting off the bus in 20 minutes and I had to be there to meet her. The charge nurse came to mediate and confirmed my situation and that if anyone was in charge it would be her. I went back into the room to get my harp and said out loud, "I have to go home for a little while, but I will be back to play more music for you."

When I got home I found my front door wide open, the dining room table had jewelry box drawers upside down, and the den double french doors swaying in the wind pulled off their frames. I ran to my harp room, my other harps were safe. Then I ran out the back door to my neighbors to call police and then wait for my daughters. The next four hours were consumed with police, house searches, drama, and my guys having to board up doors until the next day. After dinner my husband had both girls under his wing and he asked why I was acting so agitated since the house was barricaded. I told him I wasn't frustrated about the robbery and our wedding rings being stolen so much as I felt I was breaking a promise to my comotose patient. He said, "She doesn't know you aren't there, but if it will make YOU feel better, go."

I got to the hospice at 9PM. The charge nurse smiled and said, "She hasn't died yet. She's waited ALL this time just for you. She should have been gone hours ago." This woman was ancient, only 80 pounds and had already outlived family and two of her lawyers!

I went into the dimly lit room, sat next to her bed and bedside table. I whispered, "Lizel, I am back. I will play some music for you and you can relax and breathe easy now." I played for ten minutes and there was no change. Then I noticed the bedside light was burning hot on my right arm but I didn't want to shift away from her. As I brought my gaze back to her, she had rolled over on her side in fetal position facing me, not laying out straight. I continued to play every song I knew, some improv. At ten till ten she straightened out on her back and let out a big sigh. Intuitively I began to play 'Till we meet again.' She sighed again and there was a smile on her skeletal face, showing huge teeth! Then her mouth closed, her face muscles relaxed and tears were coming down the sides of her eyes. (I've learned in my hypnotherapy work, this is a natural relaxation state for tears to release, this was not tears of joy or sorrow.

I matched my chords with her breath. I started watching the clock, the inhales were a minute apart. About ten o'clock the inhales were 2 minutes apart. I sycronized with her, and pulled long resonating chords (G) at each intake breath. Then at 12 minutes after ten I noticed it had been 3 minutes since the last one, I turned to look at her face and she was indeed gone. The room was now very cool, the lamp didn't seem hot at all, my arm was very cool as was I, there seemed to be a light breeze like the air conditioner but this was winter. I continued to play for another 20 minutes. Used Healers' of the Heart(tm) naturally .. most often..thanks Cyndi.

When I walked out to the hall with my harp and case the two nurses at the charge station were crying. They said, "thank you for playing for her. We don't get time off to go to patients' funeral and there won't be one for her since she leaves no one behind. So you actually played her funeral service here for her. We loved her so much and you gave her that gift."

The charge nurse came down the hall with her arms wide open. She took me in a hug and said, "Thank you for coming back. She waited for you. You did the right thing all along. God bless you for k eeping your promise, for her and for us."

If ever that was pay back, that far exceeds any hard cash... this was heart cashing in.

{Copyright Betty Butler, MA, NCC, CMP, CHt Healers' of the Heart(tm) Outreach Grief Counselor, Hypnotherapist, EPEC trainer (Educating Physicians On End Of Life Care) 2006}

Check out this article about Betty in "Latter-Day Woman". You will see why I call her an angel.:)

If you are in need of grief counseling, please email Betty:

bbutler102000@aol.com

That's about it for now. Thank you to my readers and any new readers who happened to visit here. Again, no guest author today due to the irregularities of email and the internet. Sucks doesn't it?:)

How Can a Saying From Confucius Help Teachers?

I have so much to talk about that I will probably need to make another post.:)

First of all I missed Quotable Thursday on Pamposh Dhar's Teratali Reiki and Counseling. So here is my quote, which I found in a book called Readicide: How Schools Are Killing Reading and What You Can Do About It by Kelly Gallagher. Being a former teacher you can take the teacher out of the classroom, but you can't take the classroom out of the teacher.:) I like to imagine being in a classroom and teaching my way. This author and I think alike. It's refreshing.:)

"Learning without thinking is labor lost; thinking without learning is dangerous."

-Confucius

Mr. Gallagher starts his book with this quotation and I believe that this is exactly what is wrong with our country today. Many people were taught too much without having a chance to do any thinking about it. They went through school and learned some facts and connected them to where their teachers told them to, but teachers didn't have enough time to go into any of the areas in depth. So if these people didn't go to college where they might have dealt with these subjects in a deeper fashion, they have these unrelated facts in their heads. Add this to the fact that some people have certain beliefs that they just know are true. They have basically learned without thinking and later in life they have thought without learning. All thought needs to be combined with learning or you have basically dogma, which is a belief that you have on trust. People who have been taught to accept everything they learn without thinking about it will of course believe everything that anyone is thinking without asking for facts to back it up. Here we have in a nutshell the reason why even though Bush was basically the antithesis of what anyone would consider presidential, he still had thirty per cent who approved of him. This explains why people will accept the idea of Creationism.

Have you ever noticed that once you have learned about something you want to learn more about it? Humans learn by making connections with something we already know. The more you know about a subject the easier it is for you to learn more about it. We gain more connections by looking at things in different ways or thinking.:) Thinking is a necessary tool for learning. It helps us to examine what we are learning in various ways so we can find all the connections to ourselves that we can. The more you feel connected to what you learn the more you will want to learn it. If only some teachers understood this concept the educational system would be turning out fantastic students. Instead they are forced to push learning into kids like you would feed a reluctant toddler. Actually, when people are open to learning it is the easiest thing in the world to teach them.:) One example is any advanced class that you have taken to get a license or for an upgrade in pay. The people you are with are interested and interacting with the teacher for the most part. You wonder why this kind of interest is not seen in high school classes. The truth is that an affinity group that has a stake in their own learning is not an unconnected class of adolescents who would rather be texting their friends or on their IPods or playing Wii than be in that class. They don't see the carrot at the end. :) Maybe it would be a better idea to give them more motivation to learn than good grades. Just a thought I had and all from one quotation from Confucius.

What does everyone think about this? Sorry no interview or highlight this week. I will highlight someone's fantastic blog on Monday. Have a great Friday!! It's Memorial Day Weekend so enjoy the rest.:) More on my next post! Out-Numbered has led me to yet another great discussion. I can't wait to tell you about this new place that I've found and the discussion on this woman's blog. But that will be my next post tomorrow, which is really today now.:)